Number one!
This is my very first post here on LJ.  It's been written so I can avoid writing a paper that I really do need to write. The topic is dull and I'm completely uninterested.  However, it's important for me to finish it.  Mainly because I recently graduated.  I earned a bachelors degree.  That degree was hard earned.  I went through a lot during that period and I finished anyway.  BUT I had no cords, no metals.  Nothing for outstanding academic accomplishment.  That simply will not do.  When I finish with this degree I intend to have as much cord bling as possible.  I am also hoping to get into one of the honor societies *fingers crossed*.  It's not that I'm incapable. I simply have a lot on my plate.  I'm always tired and sometimes I just don't feel like getting it done.  Sad, really sad but when I look at my life, I can't help but be amazed that I succeed at all.

I also have a lot on my mind.  M has so much going on, the appointments seem endless.  Friday he had a procedure that took most of the day.  Thursday he had 3 doctors appointments, at two different hospitals, and two tests.  All of this with 6 children in tow.  I have very little money, as M was the sole wage earner.  I can not yet work because he needs an aid and there is a 100 day wait through the Department of Rehabilitation.  I wonder how I'll do all this.  I know I can....I think?  It will be a journey.  My cousin is staying with us and his help has come to a stop.  Now all he does is yell at my children and boss them around.  That is NOT cool with me.  If he were to help by babysitting and keeping the house clean, I'd be eternally grateful but no such luck.  He also has his girlfriend who I'm growing more and more tired of each day.  She sleeps all day long and doesn't want to do anything aside from that....and eating.  It's just adding more to an already full plate and being the person that I am, I don't know how to ask them to leave.  Being in classes and preparing for more to begin isn't helping at all.  How can I get all of this done?  Why am I doing this to myself?  All questions I am unsure how to answer.

I really need to write this paper instad of rambling in this journal.  What a great way to start, eh?


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